New Chapter . . . New Blog

I am moving on to my new blog.  It will be about what life is like being Aven’s mom.  It will be password protected on the pictures and the more personal details.  If you would like the password please email me at

sharon at tokobobo dot   com

Jetlagged, sick, exhausted and disturbed.

Re-entry is a bitch y’all!

We all are jetlagged, sick (Aven, not so much), exhausted and mommy is disturbed.  It is hard to get going when I am sick on a good day, but partner that with jetlag, new mommydom and exhaustion and it makes for serious disorientation.  I went for utencils 4 times and each time I looked in the cabinet where I keep the pots and pans.  OY! 

Now on to the disturbed part:  I was alerted by my best bud that blogland had gone through what appeared to be a lockdown with passwords, etc. while I was gone. . . I did some pokin’ around and saw that photos had been lifted and used without permission.  Anytime you put something out in cyberspace you run the risk of that, but I understand why it is done.  For many, this is the big way we keep in touch with family and friends who might otherwise not be able to have this type of access.  It is nice to be able to stay in touch without having to coordinate scheduled visits or phone chats and to be able to visit a blog at your convenience. 

I decided some time back that when I got Aven home, I was going to change to a different blog URL as this adoption journey would come to an end.  Honestly . . . .I need a fresh start.  The process, which started out as fabu, turned traumatic at times.  It is also not something I wish to remain attached to for the time being other than for posterity’s sake.  Besides . . . . based on our first couple of weeks together, chronicling motherhood should be a pretty wild ride by itself.  I want to post honestly about what is REALLY going on and to do that and share pics, I’ll be compelled to password protect much of what I write.  I probably won’t have time to make a change immediately, but perhaps over the next week I will.  I haven’t decided if I will post the URL here or not, but if I don’t and you want the URL, just email me. . . .

More to follow. . .

P.S.  Snuggling with baby Aven rocks!

” . . . and from this day forward, you will be a family forever.”

With those words from the Thanh Hoa Provincial People’s Committee . . . she legally became what she has been since May 19, 2008.  She signed the papers and nodded her head “yes”. . . she is now stuck with us  . . . . FOREVER.

Below is the picture that was over 5 years in the making . . . my father holding my daughter . . . his granddaughter.  His chemo began yesterday and he made the 4 hour trip to see his baby girl . . . No more words are necessary . . . .

 

Bathroom finished (almost) . . . I must post piccies!

We have just finished redoing baby girl’s bathroom.  Honestly . . . . I HATE yellow in general, but something about a little girl and yellow seems so sweet to me.  Anyway, the Hubs suggested a yellow wall so that it would be a bright, happy place.  I hunted for weeks for just the perfect bathroom ensemble.  Finally settled on a turtle theme.  After spending 6 hours and visiting 5 different stores I got everything I needed except for the soap dispenser and bath rug which I ordered.  They finally came in!  I put the finishing touches on this morning except for some wall art.  I think what I want to do is take pictures around Hoan Kiem Lake in Hanoi and the Turtle Pagoda for the walls and we’ll do photoshop them when we ever get to VN.  The yellow, however, turned out to be POW! Yellow instead of Buttah Yellow. . . . OY!   It will certainly wake a girl up in the morning.  Piccies to follow as soon as my camera batteries are charged up!

A tribute to Laurel Thatcher Ulrich

I have my own forum for women.  It was started 5 years ago, give or take.  Our motto was one of the first orders of business as we upgraded to a better cyber “neighborhood” and got some tricked out software.  It reads:

 

“Well Behaved Women Rarely Make History . . . . “   

attributed to Laurel Thatcher Ulrich. 

What a powerful lesson it has been for me to learn what the rules are so that I know which ones to break, how to break them and when they should be broken.  It is a lesson that I wish to perfect and someday pass on to my daughter. . . .

Rumour of news . . .

I have gotten some emails from people that were with my agency about rumours of news on bringing Aven home.  Just wanted to mention it here in case anyone has heard anything that hasn’t emailed me yet.  I’ll just copy/paste one of my responses to a dear person that was just checking up on us. 

There isn’t “news” so much as there isn’t a “NO!”.  Hard to explain I guess.  Where we are is essentially, we have moved from being denied to simply not being approved.  I realize this makes no sense to anyone NOT in the adoption community.  We have not been given a G&R and have no idea when that might happen.  I guess ANY movement in VN is better than NO movement.  So, we have moved from a HARD NO to a “wait and see”. 

That is all I think my lawyer would feel comfortable with me sharing at the moment. 

Meanwhile, back in the city . . . .

After a few email exchanges, some of us managed to get together for dinner Monday night.  Us, meaning Viet Nam mommies and me.  I am blessed to be surrounded by many AP’s from Viet Nam in my area.  It was such a refreshing change from just sitting and agonizing.   I got to catch up on the babies’ progress and listen to the cute stories.  I was given a laundry list of “what to do” and “what not to do” so I know if little Aven makes it home, I’ll have awesome resources. 

I was with AP’s that adopted children from HCMC and from Aven’s province.  It is interesting to hear about the different ways the G&R’s were handled and obviously the ages of the children were dramatically different because of the different provinces.  It was so comforting to have these ladies share things with me that I wouldn’t even think to ask about.  Truly, I have been blessed with the best people in the world.  They are great moms and great friends.  Like a big old mug of hot cocoa for the soul.  We laughed so hard at each other and that was nice for a change.  I got a call from another friend this weekend that I missed.  I could have hung out with one of the coolest little Vietnamese chicks this side of Viet Nam, but I missed the call!!!!!  ARGH!!!  That’s ok, I get to do lunch with her mom and my dear, dear friend (who seriously walks on water in my eyes!) this Friday.  Now, if we could just all get together at the same time, THAT would be glorious!  I do hope someday ALL of our babies can have one Hella Babypalooza Play Date! 

Aven honey . . . . you have so many people praying for you to come home and who have tried to help mummy and daddy behind the scenes . . . . I just want you to know how loved you are and how special your new little friends are because they have the greatest parents ever. . .  Hurry home, Sweet Cheeks!  You have at least 3 boyfriends to coo over!

Mommy had a wreck this morning. . .

I have never had a wreck . . . with a real other driver . . . . on a real road . . . . traveling at 45mph.  I have only hit deer.  Uninsured deer.  

It was my fault.  Actually it was the fault of the turd that PUT ON BRAKES TO CHANGE LANES IN RUSH HOUR TRAFFIC ON ONE OF THE BUSIEST ROADS IN MY CITY.  That car was in front of the dude I hit.  Dude was able to keep from hitting SHYTE for brains b/c SHYTE for brains got in the other lane in time, but not in time for me to avoid hitting dude. 

He was ok.  His car was ok and prolly only needs a bumper replaced.  My car and my head didn’t make out so well.  Since we were on a slight crest of a hill, the Mack truck only narrowly avoided smacking both of us.  Needless to say, we had to move our cars and luckily mine was able to be moved even though it looked a little like an acordian on the front end. 

I went on to work as I am trying to save vaca/sick time in the hope that someday I might be with child.  The fact that I was dizzy and slightly confused for a couple of hours would have been funnier if I wasn’t working on pleadings to file with the US Federal Court in DC. . . .

Maybe they won’t notice . . . .

Royal Mail indeed!

My loverly friends . . . . my loverly loverly friends . . . . Aven was gifted with with her first birthday cards ever!  The first was from Auntie Alicia and Emma and Sadie!  Then we got Auntie Tracy’s HUGE card from Wales along with Auntie Danie and Auntie Tia . . . . her little Toko cousins too!  I had to commemorate the moment!  Thank you my precious, dear friends/soul sistahs!!

 

From Auntie Tracy, cousins Jess, Ellie and Madelyn in Wales

 

From Auntie Alicia and cousins Emma and Sadie

 

From Auntie Danie and cousins Ava and Addison . . . . lookie wot cousin Ava did for Aven!

 

And from Auntie Tia and cousins Maya and Ben

Lookie what you got for your birthday Aven!!!!!

A Presidential Inauguration and a brand new President!!!! 

Mommy voted for him with you in mind sweety.  Now, we must plot to repeal that pesky little law that states that only natural born citizens can be President so you can have YOUR turn!  Or would you prefer to be Secretary of State so that you can make sure the International Adoption opportunities that should be available to orphans remains INTACT and ETHICAL to ALL parties!!!??  Think about it and we’ll discuss when we meet! 

And guess what else?  It is snowing!  I’ll take a piccie and post it later!  Going to go make some hot cocoa and dream about snuggling up with you someday and sharing that cocoa . . . .